My First Counseling Session...

Monday of last week, I met with a counselor as a part of the Employee Assistance Program through the hospital. I thought, why not? You get five "free" sessions where you are able to speak with someone about your thoughts, feelings, fears and aspirations. I really felt confident walking in that I knew anything and everything the counselor was going to say but thought it would still be beneficial. It was beneficial but for reasons outside of what I thought. This may have only been a 45 minute session but I went over years and years of my life experiences. Therapy alone was allowing myself to think deeper and express what I have kept inside.

What's interesting about a counseling session is you lead the conversation and do 90% of the talking. I realized in talking that I was providing my own therapy to myself, as I really never give myself time to map through my feelings. I like to think of myself as a highly intellectual person... and to be honest, I could step outside my shoes and know how to provide counseling to myself but learning to really act out those thoughts are hard...guidance helps. I talked about a lot that day from work, school, stress, the past, the future and just life in general. One part that I spoke up and was emotional about was the thought of death...not of myself, but of others. Y'all may think this is weird, but I save voicemails not because they say important information that I need but because I never want to lose that person's voice. If something were to happen, I want to be able to continue to hear them. Some may say that's scary -- and honestly, it scares me -- so I'm right there with ya. She explained how this is a compulsive behavior. I talked a lot about my fear of this for quite awhile and she stated that we would resume the conversation at our next visit.

The following day, my Dad's business partner and our close family friend, passed away in a car accident. This was devastating news and something that not only makes me sad, but angry. It's hard for me to grasp why people are taken from this world too early. Honestly, I don't think I'll ever fully be able to accept it but I really don't think death gives you a choice. I realized this is where my faith is lacking. I came home for the weekend after Alex passed away to spend time with my parents. I sat and talked to my Mom for quite awhile. She talked to me about the comfort in knowing that in faith, one will go to Heaven. In Heaven, you will have the opportunity to be with those that have gone before you and know that at some point, your family will join you in a place of peace, love and happiness. This is something you seem to forget when you lose someone. When my Granddaddy passed away, Father's Day came along and I said to my Dad, "this year, Granddaddy finally gets to spend Father's Day with his Dad again." To this day, that brings tears to my eyes and helped me in the comfort knowing, he was finally with his immediate family. Yes, I may be scared of losing the people I love... but I can't let that take over the time I have with them. All I can do is appreciate all the wonderful people I have in my life and let them know how much they mean to me. I need to accept that I will never lose someone because I will eventually see them again -- just like I will see Alex again.

My Favorite Quote: "What we once enjoyed & deeply loved - we can never lose... for all that we love deeply -- becomes a part of us"...

Where I come from...

When you're asked where you come from, you may respond with your hometown. However, if you really think about where you come from... you realize it is so much more than that.

I get asked all the time, how are you a Kentucky fan? Well, I was brought up "bleeding blue." My father went to the University of Kentucky and grew up in Louisville ( don't get it twisted, not a Louisville fan ;) !! ) That built a part of where I come from... I almost view Kentucky as another "home" for me, yet I have never lived there.

(P.S Root for Kentucky against Louisville Saturday! NCAA Champs 2012!!)

I grew up with a love for cheerleading.... Cheering for basketball and competition for school, as well as an all-star team -- most of my days were spent at the gym. I developed some of the best friendships in cheerleading and those friendships I will always cherish. Some choose to walk away from their sports when they go off to college, I couldn't. I cheered at Capital University and I know that it will continue to be a part of my life and someday.. my children.

(Wish this would have been a COA competition...)

I look at the house that I grew up in, the pond that I swam in and the memories that made my house a home.
Just as all my siblings have blossomed into adults, the house has continued to develop with the memories we have made in it. My basement reminds me of the many occasions I had friends over in high school. I think back to creating a putt-putt golf course in my basement with Cory and Jarin. When I think of our upstairs kitchen, I think of family. I think less cooking, more conversation. The many birthday get togethers we have, all congregated in the kitchen. I view the den as a place of conversation... a safe spot where you can let your feelings out. The experiences growing up made that house a part of where I come from, each and every room of it.

I come from a family that is open, one where there are no conversation that would be awkward to have. One where you may question if we are friends, before family members. My last name, I say with pride... because I feel honored to be a part of a family that encourages me to be who I want to be, say what I want to say, and feel like I am part of a team. This team is where I come from.

My whole life, my Dad has owned franchises for the seafood restaurant, Captain D's. While you may view it as a business, I view it as the drive behind my career dreams. No, I don't want to own the restaurant -- I actually have never even worked outside of the restaurant office...  However, it symbolizes hard work ethic and pursuit of dreams. My Dad wasn't born into this business, he worked for it. Growing up, seeing the steps of success and failure in the business, has groomed me for the professional world. It's just another part of where I come from.

Where do you come from?

Choices...

I have always talked about how your life is full of choices. Choices lead you in a direction, choices make up your destiny. For that reason, every choice is important.

Career wise, I think about what choices led me to where I am today.

I made the choice to pursue an experience with a hospital. When I made that decision, I chose to not just look around independently but ask for help. I chose to go to dinner to my professor at Capital University, my favorite professor might I add, and ask him for advice. Dr. Ledingham referred me to speak to a specific person that he knew at The Ohio State University Medical Center. He said that he will be able to lead me in the right direction and speak to me about the world of health care. I had the decision to speak to that reference or to just apply online and hope to land something... I chose to speak to the reference.

I decided to browse online to search for the hospital's phone number. I chose to view a news release that came from a department, Media Relations, and it had a phone number at the bottom. The Director of Media Relations answered the phone, where I proceeded to ask for the contact that Dr. Ledingham gave me. Turns out, this was a pretty high up contact and the Director asked why I was calling. I decided to explain to him my goal of finding an internship in health care to see if it was the right direction I wanted to go, career wise. The Director asked me to come in the following week for an interview for an unpaid internship with their department. At that point, I could have stopped right there. Unpaid internship? Why have an unpaid internship, when there were internships that pay? I was not only a full time student, but an athlete.

I chose to still go to the interview and started the role just weeks later. I chose to make relationships with my co-workers, relationships that turned into friendships. Relationships that ultimately helped me into graduate school from a reference from that same Director that gave me a chance in the first place. I chose to excel, to not just do what was asked of me... but more. That brought about a paid opportunity, which I did not expect... and ultimately let me be a part of a Stefanie Spielman event. Stefanie's Champions was an event where cancer patients had the opportunity to honor their caregivers. Being a part of this experience, changed my life. I decided that I wanted to be a part of health care, I wanted to help touch lives. I chose to take any opportunity I could to be a part of this...applying online and networking myself the best way I could.

This led to a position in Patient Access. I chose to not only take the position, but gain as much experience in this entry level role that I could. That first week, I chose to speak with my supervisor and tell him my goals and ask for help in building as much experience as possible in the role. We made a game plan to train in a lot of different areas: Emergency department, Labor & delivery, Cardiology, phone room, etc. This helped me get acquainted with the entire hospital, which helped me meet a lot of different people. Soon, I found myself applying for jobs in The James Cancer Hospital and landed a role in Guest Services for The James.

What choices have you made to lead where you are today?

Something to think about.....